The name of an old man who mentored me over five years from when i was 11. into...everything. All of me is his spirit mainlined into me, still...and a true old countryman.. a spade is a spade and wasps dont sting if you just chill out and keep still
Before these dreadful times, when if an adult may - it taking 'a village to raise a child', take innocent pure interest in a child as his guide...he wasn't assumed to have mal intent. I don't even lower myself to using the 'p' word.
I have meandered - i have a special word for it (another site uses), the regions around my past homes in the hills, above Kington, from Clun in the North to - if one dares, Tafia HQ, Brecon, in the South, for ten years. I set out slowly to diarise everything - George Borrow with a Dictaphone. And latterly for five years, video camera.
My meandering - roughly 1/3 of my waking hours - usually by foot or very old bicycle, (buses for longer stretches) , was always dual purpose. On a solo completely unplanned mission, to at first gently speak with people about Green politics and REAL environmentalism (2014 Green votes being said to be potentially growing ...organically - their potential vote.... died due the appalling Leominster Green politically aware people of the green party (Herefordshire and Powys too) , not doing politics - rather virtue signalling ONLY among their own tribe, rather than go and speak with farmers of that region i had met and who asked for visits from Green part peeps.. i have perfect recorded records - i cannot be done for libel).
Then returning to the same kinds of people - the maybe not consumerist greedy petrolheads, whom in 2016 ...17 really...it was necessary to see if ANYone would actually DO something to prepare for the possibility of a second EU vote.... 'community' they all nowadays preach, is a con, and does nothing except serve poisonous sugar in cakes once a week pretending to care... you have to do HARD work creating groups who are on the same page and may be there to organise roadside signage or leaflets or talks... my region was four quite likely swingy constituencies.
UKIP did all the above and more - 'register' old folk at old folk homes for example ... " aww sweetie hi... if you need a lift down to the polling booth 2016 ... 19 even...well we are offering a free pick up...and if the Dementia is a little troublesome we can help remind you where your tick needs to go..." quite legal. NO pro EU person ever lifted a finger. I know as i made a point over 3 years of finding out who many were in 'front facing' roles such as the many USELESS Art exhibitions of the region (except Laura Lunn) where it was moan moan BEXIT
Farage deserved his BREXIT and to have retained it...as not one did anything, ever... ohh i tell a lie Rob McCur... was delivering libdem leaflets in Presteigne the day before the 2019 vote... alone...despite having my telephone number and about 10 chats over 3 years "WE need all hands on deck...and to work together to get max bang for buck.." Nine months before him speaking into my chronicle device admitting to murdering badger cubs in the hills... NOTHING to do with the 'cull' as i had videod many before and after scenes... about 100 destroyed - high up in the hills, no bother to anyone. except the three small trees he needed to harvest around their massive 'sanctuary' set'.., just to harvest about 30 quids worth of timber... a few months before leading harvest festival sermons in his evil Church... 5 km down the hill....
The Philosopher king - AVOWED SOCIALIST...Sean of HAy ..was hustling Labour votes in HAy the day before 2019 last chance...when Labour had no chance - as we had known for years and only libdems could beat the tories.
(but keeping just to brexit, so so many exhausting chats with those on the SAME side...all trying to outclever each other... never suggesting what we may DO to attempt further democratic enquiry..i have every word of all those times.. nearly transcribed... it is ahistorical real version of nothing to do with the 'right' wing... but a couple of small wings either side of a fat dead dodo... that isn't even good enough for the roast.)
But it is then the almost full time chronicling from 2020... thats so interesting
Anyway....when i meet people i slightly 'sort' them...
i (rarely these days - no point) give them this website. Which does have the occasional link to the 'working' site - meaning fresh new all the way material , which is ralphschism.com
I chose 'schism' as in fact autumn 2022 i schismed. I had spent three months engaging face to face with over 30 supposedly caring environmentally aware people of the whole region - from N to S... with her support 'rolling out' Lucy Hurds' (Libdem Hereford - used THIS legal work to feed papers to BBC Panorama early summer 2022 about NAZI social services and courts destroying families, still) great scheme of putting a Designated Bathing Area on the Wye at Hereford - the BEST way to bring things to a quicker legal head... pollute and you really DO get one up the bum
All thirty said so so so eye to eye "WOW...what a fantastic idea!"
I had meandered through the environmentally aware - according to their FAkebook, and virtue signalling words in farmers markets etc.. They were - two or three - all you need to get a DBA going, in each of the locations where it would make a huge difference to the other also ruined rivers of the MArches. Lugg Teme Arrow
Several other locations suggested on the Wye, too.
Every single one was a people pleasing (the really sick version) liar..performing interest... not one ever followed through or answered texts or emails or remembered the conversation next time i would meet them in the streets..of Presteigne, Clun Knighton, Kington, or Ludlow...
GIVE UP
Forever
...schism
from twenty years of taking part- - leading a fair few small initiatives in fact. Schism. There is NO point. This whole society is lost. And many..maybe even half have some sort of 'personality' disorder by the reasonable measurement of such things, say 20 or 30 years ago. There will be plenty more sick tragic extreme events... childmurdering, children... seems the girls started to catch up, too...
(of late many i speak with - - teachers, those in care and social work roles...agree... but they wont speak out of course...)
At Ralph, (but there is a LOT of 'context' 18 months of many audios and videos you have to start at the beginning and that will take a year so...
...whatever....assume if you will. I know some of it is very good. Proustian liminal ... poetic at times.
(and lots of the real story here - i had to previously keep sort of coy about)
Where also
https://www.ralphschism.com/p/my-links.html
links to
https://leftovers2022.blogspot.com/
then
https://leftovers2022.blogspot.com/p/dadsites.html
and all sorts.
My favourite
https://illicitgirlsridingclub.blogspot.com/
which has one omission - i hate to lie like all incomers do ... the old lady, probably dead by now...of the drugs - illegal, hard, she would at times snort.... but i managed to keep yet ANOTHER utter fraud from harming my children that 2020 winter into the next summer... who ONLY saw good new times...and joy
And then a masup of other sort of one off sites.
The thing various new people i met sometimes i wroote things for them. NEW things... i couldnt give a toss about my past ... i am only interested in tomorrow.
SO, often i would just invite someone met face to face to see some thoughts on a subject we discussed at length in one of my active live action diary sites... sublime2020.com etc...
if i give someone only simonclayton2020.com - i dont often do. it is because i have felt, stupidly. they may actually CARE about society and just may one day DO something...or have a cup of tea to discuss possible solidarity regarding all sorts of things need DOING...or just write the book we discussed they want to write...
All people pleasing BS...
But i sometimes make extraordinary impossible discoveries...
Yesterday i did. The only person i have ever met for sure (and i am no pussy - my radar are superb, and standards quite high - so so many even great young minds i have mentored, fall to bits at the fifth fence)
who not only CAN go all the way to the last post. And be a great 'public' persona even if she writes a great book, or knitting pattern.
THE ultimate only funny warrior woman i have met. sad, as we need thousands....no man ever gets listened to after Wayne and Donald...
Her pic at ralph. For no reason other than to keep my diary records somewhat true... sadly she will be returning to her motherland...if she lived here i would un-schism to attempt to guide her with some best culture the leftovers list is designed to assist with...
I havent for four or more years felt there is HOPE ... with anyone, except her....
Fuck, she is going to have hard time ruling as benign dictator, a few countries that need her...especially this one. SO many here no longer KNOW what democracy actually IS ( .. having standard hard work democratic pushback against greedy polluting cunts - write to, then cajole, hustle schmooz.. 'leverage' - polite word for blackmail...your MP to have a word with Cargill... "my official considered advice is fuck off elsewhere as if you stay here we will make it less easy for you than say Sunderland shire.. at least a few of my harassing single issue activists sat in my lobby on hungerstrike, here have read some proper books so they may just manage to get a better quality of diatribe about you in the press,,,Sunderland most of the Northern teachers who never did their job... virtually illiterate so in the medium term the cost benefit analysis is... no thanks"' mind take part.
The end...until one day just maybe i can knit enough of thousands of essays ...some far more risque than they may seem (eg on sublime2020.com... ) hundreds of hours of audio waffle (my substack channel) ..
And make just ONE penny from creating at times quite good content..
SOme of my contacts are quite complimentary...sadly far too many are obviously younger men looking for fatherly mentoring...nope, been there, done it... no mare ever...only through books or other if i ever have...a laptop that works, and an electrical socket for a few months...unlikely. As all i care about is getting back to the EU... as i did this summer ... paradise!
BUT SEE THESE LINKS IN NEXT POST FIRST AS SORT OF SUMMARY OF HERE...and rare new viewer - i don't tell many new encounters to have a look here at thus site... i have to trust them...