Appeal - Esti's library i must rescue

 And... other things.

(this page will be added to and improved over the next few days - always behind with digital - its such an impossibility to get early morning sockets  when i am always no matter what at my fullest power energised new day full steam ahead)

Now.... i hate begging. In fact don't do it - or extremely rarely.

I have a range of acquaintances over especially the last 5-6 years who know one thing about me for sure: I NEVER moan. Ever. I had a random (likely) 'black mould' bodily systems breakdown  which floored me for 2 1/2 years from winter 2015/16. I hardly told anyone. (likely caused by 3 years prior to then for £110 week, living in 300 year old converted barns built on an actual swamp, no damp course - Rachman builder jerry-converted).

That was survived (NHS useless - The Marches they lose your tests so often not worth bothering with them) by walking...a lot. I was near dead the winters of these near three years. Eventually in mid 2018 my own immune system i guess clicked in and sorted it out.

I am the most world record wounded parent in history. 2010. It is serious - 5 years mind/body in existential grief,  at total loss of my only child who was all of life for 11 years,  but certainly by  2020 i learned you MUST laugh at it - and the baddies who either did the dastardly deed or even a  few others complicit.

A longish story not entirely told in the earlier posts here. My only wish from around 2005 to sort of turn the dastardly deeds into something useful. Even one day maybe arty.  Basis for books or songs even.

From 2016 I ramped up one thing (thinking i was for the chopping block)  which was collecting a large selection of great novels and literature for my stolen lass. All done on the cheap as i had only a few quid spare every week at best (on government sick pay over 2 years of £65ish quid a week).

Since becoming gentrified out of said  Rachman swamp (i did rather like) as the owners put the rents up 50% or more in the period  2020/1 I have only lived ion my small berlingo tin can. 

I had to store the library  that by then had grown to over 1000 books in  commercial storage and have paid £2,500 on that over the last 5 years. 

. BETTER Pictures will be here soon - i have one of all 1000 books in one place ready for storage

I catalogued hundreds and hundreds  before i went roofless so as to be aware which not to buy again 

And also carefully sorted hundreds to pass on... to parents

And then many other evocative little items such as the top quality Berghaus pack 300 quid a 21st birthday present as she was a serious hiker, but never collected.

All still in storage.

You never ever give up...

(even when not one rich incomer bought all the houses even hints maybe you can use some storage in their spare outbuildings ..or help moving... propper help i mean....I have a wonderful chronicle of just how REALLY Atomised all is even in the supposedly chummy Marches..

...oh well it keeps you fit always having to do all your own real rural work...)

 

ooh and i never ever stopped working on - so so many chats and encouraging others to fight for their cause IN PUBLIC

even if the debate got hijacked by the hurty words tyranny. (see earlier posts here the last few months what freedom of speech is FOR)

oooh and while we are at it i never use twitter but i don't lie....

Daft  to spend so much on storing the library now 5 years - well it was planned to be 6 mths!- well not really as one thing is for sure i know a great little book.  And hundreds of hours were spent trawling charity shops over ten years for anything half decent i could find at my limit ..of 50p a book. And Esti did do a literature degree at Kings in London. I assume she got a 1st. I was never even informed. I know she also went on to do a MA in  dad's lil' speciality - human rights.

My 'funding' or begging links are here - bank paypal etc . The link in red.

https://www.ralphschism.com/p/index-at-last.html

 Along with one of several attempts to collate some kind of index, there and in this one. Takes a LONG time with a socket i simply haven't had.

Sad as so many thousand readers (none or only one has ever donated to the buy me a coffee thing)  - but i plug on and will ramp that all up soon. 

But talk about the ultimate cross to bear, a lass who hasnt really been able to speak hardly at all in near 17 years (Stockholm syndrome is.... well it seems almost impossible to tip toe around - i have spent 80% of my waking hours since 2020 on just about any way i can thing of of getting her to reconnect -it  fails always - when a child has been as if a farmyard dog whipped and kicked emotionally, at that kind of age i guess they are scared for life ), but ends up doing at uni what i brought her up above all to do - read...  and then even if myself quite by accident, attempt to progress universally good 'human rights'  law... 

 

Now, why don't I complain. Because (As written up a little below here, and also more floridly on ralphschism.com) I know that few people have remained as engaged with ordinary society - ONLY doing 'causes' - i have had no social life for 17 years, you don't when your heart has been munched up and vomited back in your face for the greedy Cruella's out there,  entertainment. 

And in fact the main cause the last few years has been to write. Or begin to work on the chronicles.

Sounds a bit pretentious.  Bear with....

My 'chronicles' i shall add to this section later.

From 2010 i have still done thousands of hours legally mentoring those who have horrid family problems connected to their kids. (For NO money or £/hr coffee and sarnie if they have  some to spare) 

As of a decade ago i realised  that the Borderline Personality Disorder (i hate labels but that one is the only one i believe valid, its described earlier in these posts) is so widespread it's now not possible to make any difference. BPD I know as i long studied psych - the better modern versions, is years to just maybe assist someone beyond.

Just as one of 100s of examples i am gradually beginning to put up as chronicle in a  recent recorded chat with some Belgian middle aged parents It's almost laughable how they relate that in Belgium - a fairly high pressure, very market driven industrial society, they hardly have any 'hoarding disorder'. I know that even in my former region of 30 years - The Marches, it is very common. UK is the really sick man of not just Europe, but the world.

A chat with some Belgians a few weeks ago can be heard via this post

https://www.ralphschism.com/2026/09/to-edit-urgent-and-why-uk-is-already.html

And THE one and main reason is disastrous child psychology for decades.  this legal case was about opening up the thing so that useful (or at least REAL 'stories' could be shared across society so we may learn. Not only what to avoid, but also best practice - as in the invention of the 'peace plan' post separation in Esti's Bill of Rights    https://www.simonclayton2020.com/p/official-judgements-and-statements.html   

 the first time such a "template" - to quote Justice Hedley, appeared in a published case - as he said to assist others.   I am most proud of... 100s of thousands have used the 'parenting agreement' that was based on it, since then. 

This above chat is in my 'chronicle'

From 2015  - in honour OF a lost but highly intellectual child, and admittedly at first for some self preservation as UK is about the worst place in the world for false allegations, i kept a voice recorder with me at all times and always on whenever i was near any people. (An American woman i was frightened may make falsies 2015 after she encouraged  my  then housemate to take 'depression' medication  - we had as a perfect team working on her mental health successfully for several years, she saying no meds, likely sent her into full psychosis that required her to be hospitalised. But what they [ that American we even knew) then do is turn it around blaming others...hence protection - she had said i was a fine carer to my face - but who knows what they make up later on....so keep a record... as it turned out unnecessary that time ) 

 Anyway forget her and her lethal pills. 

I kept my recorder on during PRO EU loose 'campaigning' then the aftermath... for three years.  My time among the supposed pro EU people - hint, they did NOthing... did no preparation for maybe other questions to the electorate. Merely drowned in self pity and lack of any philosophy.

It is a fascinating record of what REALLY happened from 2016. 

And then we had the almost repeat in 2020 when nobody in a VERY rural region dod ONE thing ever to help anyone else... fascinating.

The real Britain...

From 2023 i began my unintended most interesting period of many many chats with Europeans (unintentionally getting marooned in the SW - always at quiet places where walkers may pass through) 

I know they are a great 'record' IN fact as with the Belgians it loops back into one of my two main 'causes' over 25 years - child psychology - just good healthy simple ways of being with our children... and so so many recorded chats with 100s of European parents make it clear they are at ease and very much on top of 'normal' parenting, than the British. European schools are NOT full of the self *arming, false alleging, mentally ill kids ours are.

And as it also happens... there is then ordinary life you could say: In my own work (part time land worker  - building fences, rebuilding old sheds gates etc., so so many times one gets 'gibbed' - promises made the job will begin, and maybe even continue for weeks, when they see your great work on any initial stage, then you get some weird text saying its suspended. It has become impossible now to make a living .. and this summer the drought meant almost any new jobs coming in ceased. 

 

And frankly three years of that - gibbering - a quaint old Cornish word much riffed upon in my Ralph material, has now finished one off. The tin can needs £500 to keep it on the road.....  and no tin can can't go and rescue - move to a possible new free home, that library...

The chronicles also have a record of something else that over time i know is great material to weave into some REAL culture. 100s of chats with 'religious' folk. And actually far more importantly many hundred with those who purport to care and act to save the environment (my other main 'cause') who are sadly lost to 'spirituality'. 

In both instances the record states without a camels width passing through the dumb eye of a needle,  that using god or the fairies or 'mindfulness' as crutch, stops them EVER actually following through with smiley promises - to team up on environmental matters. As for the religious its even worse.  But they have to be turned into 'based on a  true story' stuff for stories... anonymously. Not that there is any legal need, but i have a rule: those who take public money  - which also includes major public attention via online in rural areas especially, can be named.. raw data - fair game. I am extremely 'communitarian' but so much falsity within the self appointed goody goodies has utterly destroyed UK society.  Wastes especially my time - i get any cause i do, DONE. Those who don't  put themselves about much I respect their privacy. 

 

The most fascinating of all - a George Borow style chronicle of REAL Britain,  is how in thousands of chats over this decade, if one  riffs with a British person - almost always parent in 50s or older, and states " uk  has the worst child psych by far, and also it is known throughout the EU our environment is the most degraded.." they will ALWAYS say " well why on earth are you still here then.." in quite a disdainful way.... having introduced oneself prior to that comment,  as i always do, as a doting devoted parent.

Europeans never speak thus.

I find this extraordinary that almost no British 'middle class' fairly well educated person i may chat with - my main interlocutors, as most of my chatting is out walking,  can EVER think - never has said " of course you have remained somewhere you are [rightly] critical of as you have a child here and she may need you at any time...never mind they need our guidance well well into their twenties..."

There really is your REAL answer.

As i have recorded dozens of time over the years.

The top prize goes to a Christian known for years who despite being told many a time that i simply have been unable to get through to my daughter - 1000s of hours spent on it, strongly suggests it is MY fault - i am some devil in disguise. That one hurt. Most of that  doesn't.

One day i shall have the socket to upload all the 1000s of photos and bits of film taken over a decade - hardly any my lass has ever seen. They were for her.

These where she won the ferret olympics at Chatsworth House Autumn 2009 after four years working her way up the slippery pole of the ferret world - thousands of ferret fanciers gathered, and at the same show we was made an official judge by the committee as she was known as a superb animal husbandress even under the spotlight. Probably one of the youngest ever.

And then a few months later never saw her dozen of pet ferrets ever again. Or pony..or the rest of our zoo - all for her.

And no religious person has EVER offered to attempt to 'bridge'  - as i have done for many families, including very devout religious ones in my past location  (with estrangement or legal wars ongoing - ralphschism has write ups on that)  and DOES work in fact. 

Actually slight error - at a 'public' level the way that official County environmental officer The Maccurrachs (of Kington herefordshire)  in 2020 bulldozed a huge set of living badgers in the hills - i alone filmed and also recorded a talk with him where he attempts to wriggle out of their serious crimes, is top prize...as they were so so so prominent in the local large church, too....

Soon all gets turned into something useful to leave behind...

So, metoo, i have a "taboo" disability

 Having out of the blue, encountered a magnificent truth-talking mother, at something i never attend - an 'event'  - merely popping through a small town to the SPAR,  as if by 'magic' she confirms " hetoo.. he just wasn't there for our kids... " 

But... no disrespect to her as i only respect truth - the real 'taboo' versions, that don't have any real illness or even disfigurement they are the cants and vanities no one will ever speak of, to then have to tolerate the most superb singing, loud in my ear, to get a bit more of her super-truth,  and hearing the songs...

Moaning about every single thing long ago.... especially if seaman, as if they had no choice to bugger off abroad... which is in and of itself fascinating. Just how pity-poor me my once chosen medium is deep down - folk music but the hearty version. 

But nobody will write a song or even hear mine, on what actually it means to actually love and parent a kid. Twenty five years ago, knowing one had a challenge ahead, a useless once co-parent, addicted to her telly and nailvarnish; one must  just accept and act - someone has to give the then two year old some real life education, experience, travel, and an idyllic childhood surrounded by many an animal, on NO money in my piggy bank. Never mind all the tough politics to keep some society going for a kid if you live up in t6he hills deliberately away from many of them, lost souls, in the valley of Hay, below... as you can't apply your own enjoyed hermitude, to them -  that's a form of abusetoo.... and my ohh my the laziness or just stuckness of the parents around who came in from the South Eastern towns and cities, so they said to allow their kids a healthy country bumpkin childhood but my ohh my when it came to actually running their kids up the hill to about the only household left around that had a whole menagerie, precisely for that very reason - only the kids to learn from and enjoy, forget it.

But there's always a solution: even if your day is about 15 hrs on -   totally in the 'space' with them, no phones, no work, one hundred percent with child... always.  And any cooking from scratch or even a bit of cleaning you have kid involved so they learn - which slows you down in those essentials. You still have to  make a bit of money to keep you ticking over, so guess what you do with all this online, even then - 99 ..2000...  you utterly hate the stuff. Obvious the internet even then had made half the world begin to go wonky.  But you get up every single day at well before dawn, five am.. even half past four, to figure how to use the thing  - in those days just selling rarer oldish books, and no matter WHAT you put a few hours in every day BEFORE kiddo wakes up.... so that when kiddo wakes up you are 100% in the space with kiddo.... always. 

Not only what you want to be doing as there is nothing else on this planet that matches it for satisfaction and enjoyment and just love of it, and ive done things even for wages 99% of the planet - or at least the anglosheric mad part,  would give away their kids to do... but also it is any parents duty.

Thing is though.... when for 25+ years you have reset your body clock, necessarily, to farmer hours, or just healthy lifestyle hours as i know one thing for sure as does the science: you cannot have too much UV/IR, and 99% dont get even basic healthy levels (and thus also you do as much of kid life as possible OUTdoors even breakfast 2/3  the year - saves on messtoo), not only does one gradually become so much healthier in ones core, than ever before,  once that reset has fully bitten.... unfortunately one gets less 'healthy' from one taboo side effect, it is quite extraordinary as i have discovered over a decade plus of attempting to recombine (as never mind it takes two to raise a kid ideally, it is also the ONLY way smaller landholdings are at all economically sustainable)  that almost nobody will actually talk to you again, if you tell them the disabling truth:  As i always awake at 0530 latest, thats what my whole system is set to and has been for years and i do love it, too.... ehhh...  well your 10pm out in a pub at night, even if i also gave up the grape too as that just interferes with being parent.... never mind want to live in rural splendidness, the  drink and driving laws ramping up  turn of the century   

put an end to even thinking about that tragedy...

"your 10pm is my two in the morn... in fact I'm as good as dead from even eight"

you may as well be saying " i never loved my kid,  i was just pretending, ...i only know how to hate"

as they'll never speak to you again, as if you have admitted to some actually lethal contagious virus. ...

Ninety nine percent. Maybe even point nine.  

 

Now...or at least maybe one day...

 i have a superb webpage on this site as yet private, as it needs a little editing to take out any personal references even if i myself believe in total openness. It is a chat by someone from another continent about their childrearing style. He is one of the most wonderful communicators i have ever met. Despite being her as an immigrant with a very lowly job. 

(when i met him a few months ago i said  all i care about, as he knows he must,  is maybe FOR HIMSELF opening up options for himself in Europe rather than here) 

  If any person i have met in person,  is curious,  i can send them the link by email. I use ralphschism@gmail.com  more than any others.

There my broader material gets logged. There's a lot.... even if it is all 'linked'. 

My only one question about raising ANY child

 Over  the last 35 years I have spent around 2/3 of that timespan entirely 100% focused on one or other child.  Eleven years my own, the balance one or other child (0 yrs to 21) of someone else. Rather to my amazement as prior to that first kid moment i had zero to do with any of them, ever and assumed i never would. BUt from the first moment i did it is as if my DNA shifted and whenever i am in any way connected to any child i go into a 100% kid mode of what they need must be the ONLY priority. I also only enjoy that. All the rest of life is nothing, next to being parent or carer to any child.

Having all my life raised many varied animals most successfully (and caring for those of others) I will say " just like when you are raising ferret or horse, its as if a child can smell your 'vibration' from 100m away". One's 'vibe', or 'energy' - the way one comes over by body language, tone of voice, is central.  

However i have recently been enjoyably pondering an aspect of my own youth - a most beloved loving mentor, Ralph Ellis, substituting many years for parents not exactly 'accessible'.   True mutual love. But.... he was nevertheless constrained  - a kind of 'paid friend'. 

 

And so i made an audio essay on wondering what is the best practice with ANY child one may be required to be part of their lives. What are the rules? (yes a question i am not 100% certain and like feedback - nobody dares though) And more important maybe just how over the last few decades in UK  the simplest child psychology may have become warped by too many paid friends or too many significant 'others' in a child's life who can't TRULY parent them as they will be on shaky ground. Especially the step dad.

IN a standard audio  file here

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1zwsZx9D_rec0pV4xz-4JpsWbFKfU8E2j/view?usp=sharing

Though it is NOT the intent, it is also the most important reason that a 'secondary' parent after separation should still have their child at least 30% of the time ( 'shared care' from about 30/70, ideally more like 40/60 as starting place) as when one has ones kid only perhaps 3 nights (And days) a fortnight then it is all treats - ice creams and movies, when a kid needs a fair bit of time with any significant carer figure to work through that which is in the audio, as well, as be shown 'love'.

Surely some or other child rearing / psych, book will have ascertained whats in my waffle..... surely... though i have never heard it put explicitly as i have. If not pay up all my stuff is free but a man cannot live on his free wisdom given away for free, alone...

even if i do.

Which is FAR better for you as is parenting ANY child than the food faddistness almost everyone is now is sick with when try and find something worthwhile to do - even jotting this mess, and i don't mind that half the time i have to live on revolting cheap nasties...

As i know the real KEY TO A LONGER LIFE IS A BIT OF A FIGHT EVEN ...to, get it right..

as 'mentul elf' and other pages in the link below are all about. But the ONLY reason to embark on all this improvement or even self rescue, is cos you want to live a long life FOR your kids - to be wise for them, no matter what...

And it works. If you have kids, at least...

I like writing. I discovered in rather a lot of terminal pain in 2010, if you really let go...it works. Not 'catharsis'; not self 'expression' as some therapy. Nope... because the purpose of having tolerated life for perhaps fifty years, is to attempt to say something useful to future generations. I only benefited from those before me saying useful things. Often in culture.

 

 My own wafflings are a huge kaleidoscope of scattered this and that (i do not use the internet, otherwise)  over some years. But it's all really about two things - best possible psychological environment for any kid, and we can't save the environment -  i care about for my kid no matter what,  unless we had psychologically healthy young adults to battle TO save it...

Which we do NOT. Sorry sad fact of life. I know many younger would be warriors, but they can't be...

I am going to try and collect themes here in one new page of this material. My other spaces are streamlined simple just regular extemporisations...

 

https://www.simonclayton2020.com/p/the-wound.html

I may have to add one aspect i may well try and 'research'. But does anyone ever speak honestly to researchers? People pleasing and false politeness has crippled everything in my opinion... 

I have had a lot to do with other's kids too. Significantly. I always love all kids no matter what seed they come from.

But i have recently been thinking of the ideal way one needs to be WITH others' kids - significantly, over time... and also in my head weaving that with what has so obviously gone wrong in education and the world around children for some years, and i think a kind of almost fatal Little Prince or Princess syndrome has arisen - that then tipped into 'woke' or as i prefer, wussyness.  

In short putting kids on pedestals isn't good for them... we knew that in the past didn't we? of course we did...  and so many new 'blended' families as the divorce rate exploded,  i wonder this isn't a big thing...

I didn't have a step family but as i hardly had a family i did have a MOST beloved man  - father figure, i spent my childhood with SO lovingly....

But I've been thinking lately, maybe in fact that wasn't all a good thing... prince/ssiness is a form of monsterism... 

step parents, the industrial complex of 'paid friends' or paid parent substitutes (with lanyards)  many of who would be too fearful to be more honest with a kid and make sure they know when maybe habits  or 'drives' are awry and not so healthy...  

I wonder if it isn't one of the root causes of what i know every day in UK is so much BPD sadly everywhere...

To be cont.

Now, Sunday Morning ....and her eyes don't tell lies

This site (best bits around early 2023 when on posts here i attempted a big push with comprehensive argument 'posts',  to try and get the thing into a film, as i alone pushed forward transparency in 2006 to ALLOW the superb film 

 depicting how in UK (NOT Europe) the Nazis of the social services  AND other 'services' treat dysfunctional families for their own profit and pension pots, eventually to be made. Prior to me in 05-06 nobody would have dreamed that film could be made.

Sadly though other 'campaigner's did not do the WORK -  you always need to do, to RETAIN the legal progressions - especially  from 2013ish when the government started to fight back and put in new secrecy laws (i was busy being wounded over my daughter  - i will never know the truth but likely the justice ministry encouraged the  sociopath step father - seen with copper mates over the years,  to do just that - use her as weapon to finish me off)

UK is finished. It  was then.

I long ago accepted. 

And have MANY  thousands of readers who check in as I  daily trying to  write up a FUN engaging version of actual reality. 

https://www.ralphschism.com/

eg yesterday. The things you aren't allowed to say....but i would to my own daughter if she had children. 

https://www.ralphschism.com/2026/09/how-to-cure-all-yer-adhd-autism-ocd.html

And recently quite a few on 'mentul elf' - i deliberately play with words as i do not wish to be Google stereotyped - as MOANING DOES NOT WORK!

And as THE one person, in Britain, only,  me, even if we did not even have a TV,  who changed the culture legally to USE new media for social justice purposes i despair.  I  for example made it 'normal' from about 2007   for new campaigning groups to use online - example Heidi Newman's superb Mothers4Justice which started around then as my law change had made it 'normal' and permissable for them  to use personal story to highlight Maoist [to quote Lord Justice Wall a few years later re the social worker system]  behaviours.  Heidi a friend who a few years ago attempted to help me get clicks to crowdfund a bit of work on the film (my unused fakebook looking for any support, she can be seen to have supported with likes etc)   i saw over the years from 2007ish, especially 2010 and on, how that perfect initial use of online turned into a mad descent into competitive victimhood, and so many made up  or exaggerated 'conditions' to seek likes and fake online friends and attention - it always is fake.  

What you can't say to anyone in this awful land is ONLY the really good small books (literature NOT self help which is ALL fake) will not just cure you but also in time enable you to tolerate the tyrannies..

I keep lists here. 

https://leftovers2022.blogspot.com/

And most of all though i am certainly lucky in that over time  earlier difficulties (tough weird childhood even if in the wilds of the Welsh Hills)  receded and i know that almost ALL modern  'treatment' for mental crises is wrong - i have decades studied it as a hobby - an intellectual pursuit actually finding it stimulating knowing just how WRONG a society can be... 

In my lifetime i have seen or listened to (from my radio listening to the BBC World service even in my 20s a night stuck in Rotterdam  - the rock music too loud for me i would have my long wave radio with me for compony)    how an entirely wrong version of 'mental health has gradually arisen 

https://www.ralphschism.com/p/mental-elf-roundup.html

i attempt to write up my own LIFETIME insights via MANY i have known who are sufferers- plenty of mainly mothers i would go to court with from 2006ish as their lay legal ONLY last chance of retaining their kids... and from around 2010ish so many cases had slurs on their mental health from authority.

I know from an earlier life - my family had celeb connections i ENTIRELY rejected and lived among the yeomanry, ONLY, how all news warps reality, but have noted of late how this  tragic matter in USA is said to be setting a new bar worldwide as to the defence of legally insane, and listened to a few talks on it ....

BUT WHAT IS INTERESTING.... in fact the true shock, is how in the 'comments' - i rarely bother looking at (it may be in another earlier video i shall list later) so many describe how a MAJORITY of Americans are on psychotropic 'medicines' !!!

BUt i don't trust the 'self reporting' tragically maddish person who inhabits these comments we saw arise in late 00s...(AND DESTROYED ALL SIMPLE SANE ANTI STAE ACTIVISM) 

 i do trust a few comments from dental receptionists i have seen who say " when patients come to the dentist they have to by law fill out a form saying what meds they are on.. and the majority are on one form or other of anxiety pill, anti depressant, sleeping pill...." 

In short as this transfers gradually to UK you are even more fucked than ever....  

YEARS of philosophical discussion with a few fairly ok minds left  - we have concluded: ONLY engaging even fun writing can save your lost souls... and your kids' society from becoming Lord Of The Flies 

what ralphschism tries to do.... but nobody ever helps or even cares..why i enjoy riffing there, as i know you have to be a silly dreamer to get ANYthing done...and in UK EVERY english will always slag you off....

why i love a rare moment when someone agrees with me, twice! God it's heaven.... even if she won't dare give me a call and go for a walk in the hills all you ever want in life...
(ALL ENglish just scared of even talking about reality and thus they fight by instinct to shut you up...she didn't)

 

The opposite of emotional cripplegate

Now....what is the honest truth about this society?

Myself as i say " i am European" but that doesn't mean some political stance or even 'romantic' embrace,  it actually means that over the last 40 years of my life - from in fact the age of 18, i would spend at least 2/3 of my working life and more significant personal life, in Europe,  and  then also various other countries of the world. I only had to 'settle' in UK,  exclusively, only when as of around 2003 due an 'opposing household'  failing to keep to the  extremely sane deal made before our child was born,  that we would not bring her up in UK.   

I do not refer to 'holidays' Europe i mean a range of places usually off the beaten track. As apart from anything else as of turning age 30 i decided i would always live in rural quietude once more similar to where i had raised myself (in the very wilds of N Wales). All cities or big towns  are the same old nonsense, everywhere. 

Anyway my funsite Ralphschism has endless audio essays on all sorts of reasoning rather brutal, why you should leave this dastardly little aisle... and as I am phenomenally literate in a non wanker-way meaning i just drifted into all the greats of literature organically - and meandered especially the 'small' books, e.g. Coetzee's Michael K (i think his best) not just his Nobel worthy, for nobody else but me.... Basically to occupy myself travelling the world for a (HUMBLE )  living, and i have always been entirely homeless in fact i don't really recognise the word 'home' or place... anyway one thing i know for sure is I am the nearly ultimate outsider looking in from the sidelines  all my life I do pride myself on my objectivity. In respect of various cultures - who are people of any particular place, really, behind the tourist spin? 

And one thing i know about Britain (see last post on transparency) is that in Europe we are almost UNIQUELY cruel in a sadistic way (in respect of our 'systems' be they how the law and other nutjob power crazed institutions act and how it affects the citizen) ; and also there is a denial of this among ordinary people,  almost masochistically.

Also, objectively, we neither fight back, much, nor are ANY of our psychological/therapeutic systems and practices any good at all. They do NOT 'work'  - i have informally but deeply for many years studied the philosophy of such science (and biology/zoology). Yet Britain simply cannot take in - way way higher rates of genuine mental health issues than any other European country,  so as well as being almost equal to horrid bonkers USA in atomisation and the break down of the family - almost entirely caused by rampant materialism, we must be doing 'it'  - the psychological repairs, wrong.

I've recently revved up into writing on, here.

https://www.ralphschism.com/p/mental-elf-roundup.html

In fact the whole damn thing from touchy-feely language, and the new tyranny of 'safe space' to every under 50 year old brainwashed into every other word being 'boundaries'; and then a whole spin operation around older lonely people (no family left due the UK family uniquely disastrous in Europe) brainwashed into feeling they are doing some 'good' volunteering for an hour down the local community centre when what they SHOULD be doing is lobbying politicians for less money being spent on destroying family, if by no other fact than disastrous ignorance and unprofessionalism IN so called professionals,  and rather more on professional staffing who can then run such operations far far more efficiently. Years spent observing such services, when every week you have ten different  so called 'helpers' at so called community services nobody EVER gets any help as the helpers have no idea how TO properly help folk...

Assisting people with difficulties in family or in respect of their interaction with the council or the like is pretty hard work and  those in need of help need above all continuity - in who they may team up with so as to attempt to get their 'justice'.

Fact even the self obsessed  self pitying land grabbing UK church of England  had an in house network of offices staffed by longterm employed  community  facilitators - there to assist in legal battles against a council extorting you for council tax that you were not liable for, twenty years ago - more likely 30 (this related to me from the horses gob a lady bishop i know very very well) ...  but no more, even she on early retirement " Jo why dont you lobby for or at least write articles about  an even more desperate need for just such" in fact spends two years only  texting me every other day her self pitying acedia... 

The 'it' - above,  being the cultural mores throughout all aspects of  how we perform existing as human beings. Though in fact  - though i decry wanky new age 'language'  - most of which is baby words uttered by very very brittle (cored) people - and many are dangerous these days, i use one around children, only. We were supreme ferret champions. I know animals, animals respond to your 'vibration'. As do children. Simple as that.

And if you are at ease with children - almost living in them, as you would your own skin if the British were at ease in their own skins,  too (most Europeans are FAR more so)   that defines how the child will be the REST of their life...

or simply put, neurosis. If you're not properly zenned around kids you're a neurotic and that's definitely passed on down the line...NOT via genes but via learned adopted behaviour ... the vibe in the household generally does contaminate 

And the older i get it astonishes me that so called 'experts' seem utterly unable to even manage a basic obvious psychological matter that is 100% sincere and true and of course tragic too...

in this letter below two lives are destroyed for 16 1/2 years...

But to have allowed also a daily real 'silver lining' or 'evolution via being in the 'desert' for years  - for that destruction to have good eventual side effect / silver lining and not be able to say so for the SAKE OF THE OTHER.... which so few British seem to be able to understand as a truly great freeing evolution...means that in my opinion this land has gone backwards

And what really is their 'end times' - even those who consider themselves solid, evolved, deepened by tough times...

NOT ONCE in 15 years of meandering among many - mostly the middle class pious  and relatively well off - i.e. they do have time to spare for others important even life-and-death needs, have i ever heard one person say (as i would DO for others and still do) " can i maybe figure how to help bridge your lass back in to you...we can at least give it a  try"

 Bit above all the absolute lack of simple philosophyif you tell someone that matters ultimately " well jolly hockey sticks... fifteen years of only bleak wasteland tragedy.....you the ONLY thing that ever has mattered to me ....however it hasn't killed, in fact it's only enhanced me....so tell your mum she's no quarter with me...nor in fact in no way my enemy"

you are simply setting them free.

8 August 13.23

DAD from  private Woody email

To estelle

 it is in attached letter as i dont have battery easier to write by hand

i think it says it the way that can be understood.

click to enlarge

Why 'transparency'?

 In chats with especially the 40 somethings occasionally, they will blurt out the word "transparency";  but that's just a word. What does it REALLY mean in REAL life..? . that does, as one example, potentially affect two or three million people a decade. 

AUDIO  file 003 on this matter.  Not for 'posterity' but because this is how the legal 'system' works.

Last word.  But it will continue unless the younger generations take up the cudgel.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1xdbZw6Hg_BY8c1wALUSM2rYogitBYzq7/view?usp=sharing

Bridgeing, or occasional lay legal assistance, in messed up family situations

 But it's rather more the 'bridgeing' - my word, that matters, around and about our closer in communities that i know matters. ANYONE can attempt. Without any formal legal processes - just doing the 'right' thing when we can. 

And  - subcontracting community responsibility to the state, is  a major factor in now UK is at 3 trillion on the credit card.

How ordinary people can use common sense to gently support kids into healthier relations with their significant attachments if it starts to go wonky.

 

Audio file made this morning in google drive filestore.

Will turn it into a few page write up if i ever get a socket.

file 085

https://drive.google.com/file/d/14lV4ZqdXkPhQAoC6uQQ6Klco4q-5_y4h/view?usp=sharing

ooohh... and as always - a hundred or more audios at ralphschism.com substack, over last 3 years, a bit of fun personal life story gets woven in... 

THE END...as per audio its all far too weird nowadays.... i leave my material as maybe guide to others one day if it ever got a bit saner, but that won't happen for some time. to think otherwise really would be bonkers and a waste of more of my life. 

 summary - last page,  was UPDATED there was a  page  of the photographed write up missing 

ALL MATERIAL AND LINKS TO OTHER MATERIAL I create linked on the SUMMARY PAGE 

are .....NOT...OPTIMISED TO READ ON MOBILE PHONE

ONLY LAPTOP

DELIBERATELY...

IF YOU READ ANYTHING BY PHONE  RATHER THAN GPOOD OLD FASHIONED LAPTOP YOU ARE ALREADY BEYOND HOPE

AND IF YOU LET YOUR KIDS DO SO...

SO ARE THEY

Summary

 I am a mad person. I actually believed  'change' - simple societal adjustment to something healthier in the world of kids,  was possible. And stupid me i held on to that far too long.

My two main parallel 'causes' from the year 2000 were  realistic common sense approaches to healthier  psycholgies for kids mainly after family breakdown or when the state becomes involved if there is GENUINELY dangerous dysfunction in families with youngish kids. The 1989 Children's Act required the various (PAID!) services and authorities to ASSIST families facing turbulence. The first time i encountered those services  entirely out of the blue autumn 2002 and with NO good reason ( a non event custody case started and eventually lost  - vexatious litigation, by the other household) i wasn't quite as much shocked by pretty awful false evidence  - perjury, sent to courts as sworn testimony by that household (the case DRIVEN by a weirdly sick man who had walked away from his own kids a few years earlier), more at how totally dystopian and Kafkaesque the whole system was.

And i know i did more than anyone else this century to give the whole system a VERY positive kick up it's back pocket which is what it had become about - using secrecy and awful bad practice to profit from the myseries of families in distress one way or other. Many many substantial pensions will continue to be paid for decades to criminally negligent judges, CAFCASS, social workers, and even the fringe elements who play part even the security man at the court where parents are tortured in secret chambers by the aforementioned.

But i am in most ways the lucky one. Nobody else wins a case as i did by 2005. Never. We  had some fabulous years  before the madman had to attack again. (My daughter from then - 2010 has Stockholm Syndrome easiest way of describing it) 

I do nowadays consider myself having one great compensation. Which is that from around then I daily diarise and make many SERIOUS but engaging recordings. 

I have 100s of hrs on what is in these jpgs, below

 (handwritten as i am always battery limited living only in a  small van, and ALL SWest libraries are so noisy most of the time - with many ill people, its usually impossible to concentrate there  - there is no more humanity left in the UK.

THIS - click to enlarge, was the 'project'  

 I am lucky as i realised a decade ago ONLY writing honestly and openly about the mess the UK became - FAR FAR sicker than the EU ... in an irreverent funny way..is the only hope and i have a decade of recordings about the REAL version of brexit (the pro EU people failed to do any of the necessary work to harvest votes). And its the same with my other main interest the environment. All UK environmentalists squabble (or ego battle subtly) among themselves as its easier than squabbling with the actual polluters.  This is THE one reason the UK environment in the last 27 years has utterly collapsed by every scientific measure. And the rate of devastation has more or less doubled the last decade. Sorry..i have 1000s of hrs of recordings that categorically tell that tale.

But saddest of all really is that as essayed upon here a little over the last few years the 'borderline personality disorder' - i hate labels but that one at least is accurate, among the would-be 'campaigners' of the last decade and going forward is so common that there really is nobody who can now bring in any further legal reform  - it became all a hall of mirrors (or protect that which me and others fought so hard to bring in  - and my transparency laws assisted more WOMEN than men to rightly keep their kids when SS were being evil to them)

I started to realise from around 2010 that women and some men calling me with terrible legal difficulties, even if i believed they didn't deserve state torture via their kids (i always CHECK for drink drugs and properly evidenced serious mental illness)  simply had a range of stories about all their brave valiant 'campaigning' to get their kids back.. that were far more fantasy than fact. Most in fact couldn't even take the simple next legal steps they were kindly advised on over many hours, TO get at least a better quality court (eg up to the High Court - an easy process) to hear the issues... i do think that BPD is a fair label to apply - never maliciously i wanted every single one to do what they had sought me to help them WITH...actually fight, rather than make up their fighting.

So i started from 2020   to focus only one what stories / books do our children's generation now need...as i believe mine is beyond any sane hope 

(3 years before then working on maybe a second brexit ref campaign - nb it was NOT 'binding'!...in Europe it would have had to be 60:40 minimum for any serious constitutional change via referendum,  in my previous very rural region )

BUT i like ONLY groovy life affirming material, to INSPIRE,  as in THE great film Captain Fantastic. Or French film Untouchable..

I have a list of such European books here https://leftovers2022.blogspot.com/

AND more important than anything LOADS - 100s of hrs of film with our zoo at home  - esti me and a few other kids... and our many many travels by camper van all over the wild places especially. Those i must continue loading. They are I know the 'answer' I had NO money. Utterly broke. BUt managed to give a kid the fullest imaginable life. Always. No moaning. Never any self pity.

I have spent the last 5 years attempting to rev up a range of met-in- person  female writers (or wannabe) writing up THEIR bees in their bonnets but in a genuinely inspiring way.  In other words finding TRUE sublime in the great big stuck swampy mess of so much of the last few decades. Quiet a few have said to me over fairly protracted periods of time that they will. I bolster them in any way i can. But they never follow through

I have a load of part begun writing projects myself that i WILL plod on with and get published or made into film at some point

i will list them here later

mainly i jot at ralphschism.com

and there is one tab only that goes to other sites 

https://www.ralphschism.com/p/index-at-last.html

best one is 

https://illicitgirlsridingclub.blogspot.com/

"community" (and the only way i know of to appease those conducting child wars )

 UPDATE  28 July 2026

https://illicitgirlsridingclub.blogspot.com/ IS working... intermittent 'fault...

merely for fun even if i have thousands of mean readers who rarely pay a penny for my daily literary grind,  i maintain an ongoing NEVER IDENTIFIABLE travelogue .. no places ever, nor names unless they steal public money as sadly many so called 'environmental' campaigners who flocked to my PAST region - The Marches, my only interest, did... 

and it is far more dangerous to pinpoint particular practices or pollution sources than one may assume in the REAL environment, so i have years of practice writing about them in a so undercover way its daft... REAL risk to life and limb especially in the region of Titley Herefordshire..

so i maintain a completely incognito,  dreamy road trip to nowhere, a bit Proustian and rather Homeric....  thing at ralph. This was intended as a useful more serious resources site but so many (professional - i.e. publishing/ campaigning / filming) fakes pretending they cared not about me but the dystopia of family and also environmental matters...i gave up... i only jot wistfully and rarely refer anyone here.

There are also photos that go with the audio below which will be woven in here later which is DEADLY serious - ignore my words and your children will statistically die earlier 

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

BEST SHORT GUIDE TO BRINGING CHILD WARS TO A SOFT LANDING

(though i have other versions of this over the years)

So, over a decade, ever since the Lowlanders really began to invade my fringelands - it's a free world ish and selling up mummy's Loreal shares, or the house bought on them in Surrey, if i had been one of them I too would have run away from Nigel's  turbulent twenty sixteen towny places...

But they began to arrive in even larger numbers into the rural fringelands, and attempt to grift via so many new 'therapy' and 'counselling'  grifts... 

And the Swest is absolutely crammed full of every ex PR person set up in fringe places and every other PR word is 'community. Rather than the true version which is all big bowl of bloodied cherries.

Bugger me just when i need it my girls riding club the greatest community success in history i randomly started in autumn 2020 and there is a site with all the photos and really smiley stuff - we had best ever winter, for free riding horses with lasses and some mums, in the hills of East Wales 

https://illicitgirlsridingclub.blogspot.com/

it's not working and needs some setting changed,

 do come back... maybe i can fix it later today.

A pure unintended 'community' by a weird miracle i set up to keep some old horses going  - being ridden 3 times a week as they were getting arthritic due being 20 something, which were off to ebay ... 

But in that community (i ran with my farmers wife friend as protection) there were two women despite being very tough horsy women, both who had  really quite bad substance abuse problems for years - one booze, the  other god knows what was in her freezer as well as the 'peed' she would enjoy letting slip - age sixty nine and all her life in that very rural bungalow

Over time it was obvious that the one lost to the grape (the WORST of all substances)  needed some informal guidance as to how to build bridges her near teen daughter and the other household, at war for years... no 'services' opertaing even if they only chuck petrol on the fire..

which is when REAL 'community' work is needed...

for months i attempted to brief up my right hand woman/ mum  as to how standard turbulence within once calm families is fixed...

Everyone wishes to complicate it or just not listen.

Here is the BIBLE part 1 and 2  on at least attempting to bring some calm to the (child wars) situation and theyre all the same  and in my opinion ONLY having a few inner circle local people involved, also..is the one solution that works a little better than parents slagging it out via serrated edged texts alone in their bedrooms all day and night....  

audios 60 and 61 made 26 July afternoon, after a good nap in the bracken in the hills. 

I like to ramble... for fun... part 1 begins rambling along on seemingly unconnected subjects merely to entertain...

but then gets to the meat of it

(which incidentally also if possible must have some mirth in it... laughing at ourselves, the pickles we get into)

click to google drive folder where they live for now

folder called COMMUNITY SOLUTIONS TO WARRING PARENTS

but also included are the basic RULES of how to save your kids from terrible angst as the parents are warring

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1CQN8kTbIIIyx2dJVNr6Jg-wepgi1Z16J?usp=sharing

and proof of zen good vibes during recording my audios above,  meeting the toughnut nags never met before

 

It's so so 'simple' and such a world record failure

 (hearing from a rare one i could trust a few days ago, that in mediation the parents  weren't shown a PARENTING AGREEMENT, before the bloodletting,   spitting, hissing evil looks  - as if a whole swarm of flies were buzzin around their eyes, began...in 'mediation'  and told " ok hiss spit thats what you are paying me to sit and listen to...  but even if you have three years of top judges telling tales ... s/he will still say 'well done' if you draw up one of these .... everyone else has to eventually  - there's a box in the c100 court application form, asking you if you have one YET!!! and if not bloody well get one.... and there is a hard way and an easy way..." )

Justice Hedley third most senior judge in the whole bowl of cherries said this was a TEMPLATE for everyone else..

This page 

https://www.simonclayton2020.com/p/official-judgements-and-statements.html

scroll down and start at 

and then down into schedule 2 *

which was the first  ever 'parenting agreement' 

'Esti's Bill of Rights...' as they described  it  to her with true admiration in her solo interview dad wasn't even allowed in the booth to coerce her into saying 'dad did it' , in her radio 1 interview a year later. 

Dad may have added " ferk me ...you would have thought with decades of divorces in and out of the courts SOMEONE  by the early 2000s would have thought of a little written peace plan before i came along knowing i was entering the maddest load of weirdos ever and their so called 'justice' system which merely profited from the fact that nobody had dreamed up a written little UNIVERSAL   'cheat sheet' so they didnt have to go through years of lawyers and pain...I'm pretty thick and a bit of a yokel but even i knew that  just jotting down the ideal end game often works.... even the Yanks not known for their peaceful adventures figured the way to appease 'em back home is a nice little thing that does often work, their constitution...but no not the British.. theyve always got to do it their own way they always know best that everyone has some individual need and pain....  " etc

So i am world record holder in a completely failed  endeavour ....  as still even now they aren't told from day 1 by yet another con artist 'mediator' " heres a little useful 'resource' for you... kerching thats 50 quid, at 100 an hr...  if you still need me to be the spittle referee after reading that piece of paper... ok but thats  500 quid an hour... your mother in law [either sex's]  was meant to be the one who whacked back into shape with her handbag, when you needed to pull yer socks up.. but of course we've made that illegal now, too... "

* i have a range of them then further developed over a decade slightly better wording that all courts accept as brilliant  .. eventually.....when the judge has gotten his  or her pension pot out of you....  it not being in their interest to put themselves out of a job, either. And TELL you on day one.... "you'll end up with one of these eventually... theres a hard way..or an easy one.."

They can be emailed as templates though my email a bit wonky too

07958 five 26 381

 

My life story, cont

Now, as per  the second audio down on this page

The end says i have one UNIVERSAL standard responsibility... to leave something to show i no nutjob and as for 20 years i have done unpaid serious family or other citizen-rescue law in UK  - all people i have nothing in common with as i didnt need rescuing 35 years ago when i 

 give up booze...only 150 units at most in 30 years.. 38 years ago all illicits...  

gave up ( an unintentionally 'glamorous'  even if it never was  - lots of cleaning up popstar vomit or making breakfast for them at 5am nobody else around ... and cleaning their bogs abord a little ten seater... but the true glamour and fabulousness in it was by age 18 sat in bignobs aircraft i knew they all without exception had truly awful lives so tense so egomaniac sad... never ever have i met a celeb or rich banker and i may have had to spend days with them as their taxi..very close in..they would tell their deepest secrets to their cheauffeur sat next o them about to go through a certain-death thunderstorm over the alps.. not one even knew what 'peace' or real mirth meant...)  gave up what to everyone else was a great job 27 years ago as dad needs to always be around for kid AND protect himself ..ie not run around on stupid dangerous motorbikes (ive never been stupid enough to) or flying dangerous puddle jumpers through thundertorms at 5am nobody to hear you scream as you plumet especially if over N italy the worst inhuman airt traffic control in the whole world...  never did their job  of working with the pilot to avoid dangers ...too busy on the phone to mamma telling her how they wanted their bimbo dressed for dinner when they got back...a bit like my bro in law when it came to "its MY  maaaayhhhyyyy wedding.." i still remember the exact look on his dinosaur face...

anyway nothing to do with me i already knew kids need parents around always...

once becoming adult my own whole life about creating an only healthy wholesome environment with plenty of Other Animals away from all of those junkies users and Conran shop addicts...

people only of no value who never talk about the value of anything, merely the price of what their lovely sweet competitor girl shelled  out for the antique handbag in Portobello..

My own life only kids from 1992 .. only, forever no matter what..

saved my life..

and also a bloke is a FAR better person - more decent moral and all that if he does manage to become the  committed dad...

But theres always a price for real things  - i never realised until i left the past region 3 years ago just how deep it all goes even then 13 years on from the worst wound ever...  

 every time i went up to Herrock hill (see ralph)  30 km nearly from the Black Mountains i could see afar the hillside high up i last lived with lass so perfectly for 7 years...

and then evil Pen Y Fan in the distance mission control for the Stockholm Syndromists and all their nasty mates..

and maybe my lass may still be there .. being (to Quote the head of CAFCASS  Anthony Douglas who knew us quite well - well his so warm smile to esti in 2006 at the conference...on her law...with even NAzi thingumy bob Harmon there - the only one who snubbed my lass asking for a moment qwith her one to one her not busy... to allow a child have a great example of a woman in power... bitch not a word i use often but talk about the definition of one... , in 2013 ' his times piece 'emotionally abusing' a child by tearing up High Court orders... so her grandmother complicit too in that clearcut ) emotionally abused even by her grandmother complicit..

lovely country... great stuff for an opera one day far better than Mummy boy italian nonsense..

anyway, leaving old horizons ferk i never realised what its like not to have thirteen years of often a few times a week the most painful imaginable aides memoirs on my horizon even after moving 20km away...

nope.... you gotta be in a no memories place so as to partly recover even if unlike every single Brit one ever ever hears i never moaned to anyone...

But you want to spit at the BBC with their recent radio 4 vile nonsense of 'child free by choice'  - i bet they even have a hashtag ..  because apart from other things like civilisation itself, and also how men can be made safer  so all of us are safer on average....every childless... errata lets forget about my factual assessment of 20 years chronicling...

i have several long long interactions over months with several obviously central community orientated women mums who quietly to my chronicling devices do say what i would never dare.."  uhh ohhh....another emotional vandal with no kids.....the childless ones especially when they get to fifty plus with no purpose any more they assuming theyre no longer desirable [in and of itself the very opposite of truth as the only sexbombs are the 53+ ones who still have that fighting glint in their eye..it tends to straighten their back and make em almost eternally youthful... shame Woman's Hour never told them that either...where was i ] ....god its always them causing utter vandalising mayhem...  " several sane women have said to me on the last phase of chronicling...

...anyway to be cont but far too long of such even occasional pretty little vandals who cant even listen to such simple things as'' landlords [the BIGGIE as insecure accomodation makes you so nutcase you may bash some passing innocent bloke lose your kids to SS and end up in.. , courts, coppers, social workers even employers and certainly fellow green campaigners... do NOT pick on you if you are in a couple as i have noticed almost always happens ... and i am good at noticing... couples are treated FAR more reverentially by the aforementioned  who fear that at least one of them may be able to counterfight back... if they pick one one half of a whole...

 which history proves to be the case never mind most of tax and economic lore favours the doubled up...ask even an inhuman  insurance quoting  algorithm 

and this became almost impossible as every fake flowergirl bought up the country cottages whist in their rare stable phase, even married or a deux,   or even businesses ... got very bored got into trouble and ran off back to Hemel Hempstead or Primrose Hill...leaving him behind crying into his beer and then becoming one of the 4:1 left behind..

the tourist guides never mention that...

to be cont

Best vehicle info you will EVER find (not on oggle either)

 in here is part 1 of why i need a grand by monday or its crusher time....

https://www.simonclayton2020.com/2026/07/come-and-get-your-free-selkie.html

(ohh and as every single conartist who left the towns and cities discovered fraudulent crowdfunding especially if they can put pictures of their kids on front page of their 'offer', so  forget that...)

but here is the REAL reason

sent to Agent Z today (and i understate so as not to be thought insane as for 6 years i have worked unpaid on at least 15 VERY complex rescue missions those damaging kids due being alcy etc etc etc...(2020-21 in The Marches NO services at all available and ALL self appointed good burghers of Presteigne wouldnt help all they could do was bitch.... never assist  5 or 6 fairly ok women we had known for years .. who were killing themselves due neurotic reaction turning to serious booze who could easily have been assisted i spent 347.5 hrs on 3 of them....  then still stupid me 20+hrs a week attempting to nudger women into regional eco projects FOR their esteem  - me i hate Dooneshire its even faker than Presteigne or even Hay and that takes some doing.... at least 20 hrs a week on average often 30 on ..  bolstering others into THEIR causes ... and every single one turns out to be partly as below  )

and incidentally your dad sometimes does  - actually quite often,  for the last 7 years especially, attempts at linking one woman i have gotten to know over a period of time with HER eco issue she wishes to highlight in public  with money or expertise, and also i do some child cases...

i mention this as now 75% of the time one discovers after some months 'borderline personality disorder' what it means is someone will say 100 times to my face they are a true campaigner for justice - that they have had endless meetings with mps or other power saving their community!...  that their kid has been taken by ss wrongly (which is true i usually see if i see their papers - the injustices are terrible and obvious) ...  however when presented with a  simple few steps to get the matter rightly back on track in a court   - how to appeal NAzi court orders... - and they have just spent weeks barefaced telling me they are expert and real Boudica... 

they never take the steps needed ..

it is performing only a PERSONA to those they meet - it is their 'identity' to all and sundry,  that warrior expert against bad state actors...  but they are unable to take the RATIONAL steps to deal with a truly important issue...obviously they are told they will be supported as mackenzie friend at court....it is so sad and wastes literally hundreds of hours of my life every year 

its a very good definition of BPD and i see it in SO many others too now.. including the women who i support as potential eco warriors 

I do NOT use labels especially the 'narcissism' everyone else uses about everyone else, but its even worse really than the default 'people pleasing'  that is ALWAYS now in all eco work 

BPD  - don't look it up the official 'definitions' are simply absurd  - anyone could be guilty...

even if at least 50% are guilty of the above, sad reality of modern UK

real reason # 3... 

to be cont 

real reason #4

 if i avoid the crush i will advertise here the best MOT garage (he lives also in a  van due gentrification by the whicker basket brigade)  in the whole world... 

Why all eco fails (The ONLY trusted ecoscientist and many generation fruit grower says, today, to me in person, bees will be down another 50% after this year)

due xenobiotic molecules all around 

And the lack of flowers as the councils still must weed...even devon in places to look like Surrey as was the case over all of Horrorfordshire for many years DESPITE it being a George Monbiot holiday destination for many years .... you should see the way the birds would flock to him when in residence in the HAy pubs... the only real reason he would go...

when bees need a food supply about every 50m or they die of hunger in the warmth... 

This goes with this explanation of...why even in the river wye autumn 2025  when water testing was done properly (due yours truly nudgging folk autumn 2022 to copy Lucy and her designated Bathing Area solution ....even if the utter egomaniac wankers couldnt listen it needed to be DOWNstream of HAy-on-Wye  everyone swims at The Warren regasrdless....and downstream of there it would have collected even more toxins...)

why in a large river which meanders through the CATCHMENT of all the small hamlets around and about many of which do NOT have municipal sewererage so its about private systems .... 

even diabetic medicine traces were found along with other drug paraphernalia

its the DOMESTIC private systems JUST as much 

 audios on that NOBODY will ever talk about as it will affect their Thatcherite businesses.. of I am my cottage

And Andy unThatching will never get to why the rivers are REALLY ... finito

not the only immediate answer, STOP... using almost any chemical in THE environment,  which is land above around 150m which is less arable and became South Easterner occupied zones...

as itzy bits always end up where nobody intends but it always works out just so... 

https://www.ralphschism.com/2026/07/so-uplands.html

(and as we all knew years ago George's second home in Machynllell wasnt a second home rented out to local people for the going rate as his 'investment' , it was a  known as,  by him,  his private little....  '"community".. blessimmmmmmm . )

But the only guide we ever needed was

 

and updated a tad by

Ahahhh but there is a poignant reality check upon 'real' Britain in just one story. Below. A truly sad one. 

All my adult life from watching the Three Colours films then even Killing Fields (best ever film on spirited resistence)  via fluffy and most intellectual ones ones such as Ring of Bright Water (free on Youtube superb rewatche dit just the other day...sadly i never met a real life Virginnia my own perfect babe ) or La Grande Belazza simply stunning on the hypocricy of the modern times,  yes... as i dont like blood and gore or any horror films, and knew to draw the line about ten minutes into The Shining as a teen, nope... vile over the line into awful gratuitous violence  Killing Fields is allowed as its got a superb moral tale in it... that changed my life "god i could never ever ever be that beautiful amazin  ultimately brave Dith Pran" my own immediate reaction  - i felt small walking out of the Notty Ill Corronet that eve.

To reform any important matter such as approaches to child healthy psychology (via the first ever post divorce peace plan as in https://www.simonclayton2020.com/p/official-judgements-and- statements.html  which is what i am 'proud' of as the BATTLE with ridiculous snotty officialdom just to have 'Esti's bill of rights' as it was called in media,  written up and published in that judgement as EXAMPLE TO OTHERS so said the High Court Judge.... as it would HELP them not be in perpetual war,  they would argue forever (that day in the High Court)  whether or not i could use the word 'rights' or not in schedule 2 ... " the child has the RIGHT to...." was at the front of each bullet point but they had to check back to the Queen and Cia and just about every child-hating creep that is the 'establishment' in uk.... I do not jest.  

Anyway to achieve anything such as UNIVERSAL practices in family law that are for universal better psychologies for children if the state ever has them on their radar, is such a massive effort (and its gone backwards since 2013ish), or to protect the environment in THE 'environment' which is rural regions with low population densities such as the Marches where i was based for 30 years, requires ALLIES. Committed people on the same page who's values you understand and you trust will remain consistent (most reform of anything even hamsters rights to have their wheels health and safety checked once a year,  takes at least 5 years )

I had a My Family And Other Animals childhood except up above 300m  - the hills.... Except without 'my' family as they were all lost to the sickness of acedia, alcohol codependency and shopping elsewhere...

I am lucky i stuck only to the animals, divorcing the family. Very young.  But i had one or two ok schoolfriends who also had that within - nature and the wilds, and a real approach to life.... it must be kept decent and simple. No need ever for hysteria or being ranty or stirring up say for example racist tendencies..

Just one such schoolfriend in fact the one i remained closest to over the years came to visit me 2018 and he pretended he was so ultra green STILL, on behalf of his nearly grown kids. Even if he was a Jumbo Jet captain for the previous 30 years he still seemed... ok... 

I told him " if you love those kids of yours and  want them to understand OUR childhood [ his dad was a great freespirited eco lover of the hills like me]  then make them watch Captain Fantastic, i kicked myself as i was always a bit arty elite intellectual and scrolling down the lists of maybe good films in Guardian or Time Out film lists for some years i said to myself that looks twee crap... skip that one! Until one day i just was bored and couldnt find anything else to watch.... Pete its just perfect!"

Assuming he would be a bit prejudiced against the father figure in that film i expected him to have forgotten  it as rantings of a nutter (me) even worse that his PEOPLE PLEASING  sickness of " hey i will ponder a way of bridging for you both back in to  ... our famous Esti and give you a call..maybe invite her to meet my daughter down at ours... get her to mine and try help sort her head out" which of course never happened due the national sickness (i did a pictorial version of it today for someone,  i am rather proud of): ... inability to ever say what you mean and mean what you say (around children is literally lethal...THE biggest cause of mental illness..in them)   

Anyway to my amazement Pete watched it and reported back on the phone..." Simes [ should be named and shamed just for that i hate my name and hate Simes even more..] ... that movie is so brilliant on kids and society and how we are ruining it for them but SO genius funny too.... i am going to make my whole family watch it every six months...."

Ok well at least i did some good in the world... or rather, did, and the national sickness (that sadly is a form of BPD) .. even got to Pete... when a year later he is getting all Farage-Carswell..and even a bit Widecombe on even me....  sending pro UKIP stuff in daily.... and cant even have the conversation " pete we had so many good people we knew who were immos... why this turn in you"? 

which is really bad BPD cos  as he knew my lass only exists cos of liberal immigration that the fine EU allowed... and to attempt to get all bigot about that with me was an insanity in and of itself..

In other words even with ones cast iron 40+ year ally... (asking him to get involved in nature protection with a soon to have nice fat pension) ... there is no more any reliability ever in the UK as to what someones values may indeed remain...

(Ralphscism mainly has unique intellectual reasoning as to why this is a genuine reason that serious psychosis has increased... that mental elf post recently and others back the last few years even if i do try and be a bit Captain Fantasticy as earnestness and piety never ever works - no green can ever understand this which in and of itself is another illness...

. the bit where they lovingly flush mum down the bog.... a BIT of comedy  i do believe does 'work'.

 ALL THIS MATERIAL VERY ROUGH FIRST DRAFT AS FOR 5 YEARS NO ELECTRICITY LIVING VAN AND REALITY OF SW  NO ONE EVER ASKS YOU IN FOR A CUPPA... or just use of their elec for a while

and the libraries are SO rudely noisy always (BPD) its impossible to work there.....